Prorogation Ruled Unlawful: The Latest Catastrophe in Boris' Marathon of Failure

Mr Johnson hasn't had the most successful few weeks; failure to force No-Deal, failure to stop half of his party walking off, failure to brush his hair throughout all previous failures, and now as his stumbling parade of humiliating ineffectiveness reaches an astounding crescendo- failing to not lie to Queen Elizabeth II.

Many people were audibly opposed to Johnson prorogation of parliament, John Bercow being a prominent example- 'this is not a normal prorogation of parliament' he exclaims minutes before plodding solemnly and begrudgingly into the House of Lords to hear 'democracy's fucked' being expressed using archaic vocabulary by people in red gowns.

5 weeks of suspension were supposed to follow, until a High Court in Scotland ruled the suspension 'unlawful' and that Boris had 'misled' the Queen as to his motives. The motion was then passed onto the UK Supreme Court which, as of today, has declared the suspension of parliament very much unlawful. Members of Parliament have therefore been required to return to parliament and resume what Boris was assumedly trying to rule out- sensible discussion on the eve of the country's most dramatic political crisis to date.

As suspected, a lot of people have hence called for Boris to resign after failing to- well, just failing indefinitely I suppose, but if the mound of shambolic past mistakes that Boris is currently perched upon hasn't been enough to topple him as of yet, we have to ask ourselves- 'is this the final straw?'